The basics in dating

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The basics of dating

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The basics in dating are about the quality of the personality that girls seem attracted to. Confidence appears to be a winner. To get confidence is sometimes a catch-22 because to get it, you often need experience. And girls can” smell” (pick up on) if you have a lot of experience with girls. There are subtle shifts in your body language when you have confidence. It’s about how you look at people, the way you talk, and the tone of your voice. People with good fundamentals don’t need to play games, such as being hard to get, to get girls.

The power of humour:

Humour is a winner; being funny makes people laugh, and laughter is a bonding tool. Also, if you are funny and can make her laugh, you attractively influence her. Girls enjoy people who can give them positive and good emotions. Laughter makes the nervous system more relaxed. Laughter creates the hormone endorphins, and a shared laugh establishes a bond of friendship.

The power of charisma:

Charismatic people are people that are in the flow! Another way to say this is that charismatic people have few limits, few traumas, and few limited beliefs. People that have few limitations, aka inflow, are charismatic! Nothing is holding them back from expressing themself, to be open and talkative! Research suggests that charismatic people have more influence than ordinary people. Charisma, I believe, also applies to date and seduction. Guys that are charismatic/have power can easily influence girls to have sex with them!

charismatic, influence, limited beliefs - The basics in dating

Being social

Being social is sometimes the same as being” normal”. Because if you socialize a lot, with a lot of different people, this will form your personality. Others can notice that you have a history of a lot of socialization. You will send out good vibes by being a guy that often socializes. One TRAPP is people below average/below typical try out PICKUP and seduction techniques they have read about online. This comes across as CREEPY! Step 1 – Be normal. Always Socialize and have a balanced life before using Pick up technology. When ready, learn more about pickup, attraction and gaming here: How to attract girls – Dating –

Socialize to receive good feedback.

I often socialize within my social circle and do not hit on the girls there. Doing it this way leads to helpful feedback from the social process. Then when I meet girls from the net or at nightclubs, they can pick up my stored feedback from social circles! Because of good validation from my social circle, I get better feedback from girls! Then, the social process picks up the stored feedback I have received from dating girls. All this feedback from these different areas is «stored in your body, ” leading to better body language.

This leads to a positive spiral. If you do it the opposite way, hit on the girls in the social circle, your feedback will be different, and something will be missing when going to the nightclub. It is not impossible to close girls in your circle, not at all. But for the average reader, I am suggesting using them as friends! At a high level/ having good fundamentals, girls will try to chase you in the social circle, but that is at a high level (being in the positive spiral for a long time). To get rid of bad feedback and validation, read more about how to release tension here:

social circel, feedback, release tension, body language - The basics in dating


We all need social contact. Many of us project that needs to the opposite sex. But, you will get that need covered by hanging with friends or family. A person with high neediness (the need for social contact) is not attractive. Being needy implies you don’t have friends since the neediness is high. Your neediness will drop when you hang around friends and socialize. By socializing, you will become more attractive to women because you are not channelling your neediness onto them. You are spreading your neediness a little bit to EACH of your friends.

If you follow this prescription, nobody will complain, and you will be attractive in everybody’s eyes. That is why the tips about dating other girls help you out of obsession over one girl. You should NEVER channel all your contact needs to ONE person. Even in a relationship, you should hang with friends and socialize. The most healthy relationships are those when you are excited to see your partner. To conclude, non-needy is attractive because it implies you have other options. Different options are an attractive evolutionary trait, hardwired into our brains and genes.

Clothes and hygiene

This is obvious but still very important. Cool clothes, an excellent haircut, and smelling good and friendly hygiene are part of the fundamentals. Your” attraction threshold” or fundamentals will be below if you don’t have this. Having good fundamentals in dating is the most important thing to work on. It is the thing that gives you the best feedback and responses for girls in the shortest amount of time. An example of guys with sound fundamentals in dating is the two guys, the main characters in the Tv show “One tree hill. Girls will automatically like you when you have everything mentioned in the order.

clothes, hygiene, self esteem, fundamentals - The basics in dating

Good self-esteem

Good self-esteem is usually a consequence of having humour, suitable clothing, socializing with friends, and having confidence in your people skills. This will lead to both charisma and self-esteem. When you have a lifestyle you are happy with, you don’t get needy or desperate. Non-needy people get more liked than needy people. Because it implies, they have fewer friends. Having standards and spending time on things that benefit you will lead to success. The leading authority on the self-esteem topic is Nathaniel Branden.

” Game” often conveys to girls that you are non-needy (even if you are). People need to READ what they can say and SMS to be perceived as non-needy. Reading is essential initially, but the long-term goal should be to have a hardcore inner game. A solid inner game, or having good self-esteem, leads to a smooth outer game—what you say and do comes automatically and naturally from good self-esteem.

Naturals have been raised right and have had good programming since birth. These guys have often had loving parents and have had some” luck” in that it was a great neighbourhood, including School class. They have always had a lot of friends and have been popular at school. Because of positive feedback spirals, they also have good fundamentals in dating. Feedback forms people and shapes them, as explained earlier in the post. People categorize people into red, yellow and green flags when they screen for their perfect partner: How to selectively choose partners – Dating –

These are the fundamentals of dating. If you want others to be in the know about this or share what you know, please feel free to share! People realize this information subconsciously, but it is good to put words into what they know!

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