How to be selective in choosing partners

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Being selective & having standards

Have you ever heard of being selective & having standards, and wondered what does it mean? Many guys who enter the dating world, just want to find a partner. Many guys feel alone and don’t get their needs met. Some experience getting rejected when they try to approach girls. What then happens is that these guys get more and more desperate/needy and will accept «any» women. If you experience getting girls as hard, you will receive any women who say yes to you.

The irony here is that when you accept any girl, you send out all the wrong signals. The Scenario above is something girls intuitively understand will make a guy drop his standard. Girls can pick up on these things. It comes out in the way you talk and behave. The irony here is that if you send out vibes about being selective, more girls will be interested. Since girls are used to getting guys easy, they value a guy who is a challenge:

As you probably can guess, showing you have standards and being selective makes you a challenge. This is a specific trick to use to get women and get them to be more responsive towards you. First, you must identify what you want. Find a pen and paper and write don’t 5 qualities you like in girls. Then write down five qualities you don’t like. If a girl ever asks you what you want and what you don’t like, you have to be able to answer her. Remember that your thoughts lead to your behavior, so get this sorted out.

To help out guys with understanding what is hot and not, here is an example list:

HOT (things you want in your life)

choosing partners, hot things you want in life

– Girls who are good at giving you compliments
– Women who respond at SMS/Facebook within a reasonable time
– Someone who shows interest and can take initiative
– Is happy and positive
– Laughs and jokes around a lot
– Has some brains, for example, a three years Bachelor degree
– Has a job
– Able to control their drinking
– Have loving parents
– Is empathic and fair
– Appreciates somebody treating them well
– Wants to grow, learn, likes psychology and self-help
– “Positive vibes” in the sense that you feel good about them

NOT (things you want to avoid)

– Girls creating drama
– Bad boy magnets
– A woman who drinks too much
– Is unfair and not empathic
– Values Revenge
– Doesn’t have a job
– Has little education
– Has a troubled childhood
– Is needy
– Overuses the “hard to get” card
– Uses too much time answering SMS/Facebook
– Can’ t appreciate being treated well
– Is often sick, doesn’t care about her health
– Has a “mask” – where you can’t share everyday thoughts or feelings with her.
– “Bad vibes” – you feel drained around her

Now, this was just an example list. If you want to pick five things you like, and dislike from this list, feel free to do so. The old saying that «perception is reality» works here as well. When you know what you want and what you are looking for, you will find it faster. The other side of the coin is that girls feel that they are qualified when you have standards. They think they need to prove themselves to get you interested.

Another tool for you to attract more women into your life is to tell a story about what type of behavior you accept and not. Tell people about a past girlfriend, and the reason you ended it was because of a specific action you did not like. People will then not behave like that around you. You can tell stories about how someone misbehaved. What you like about specific people, what you like about your friends, what activities you enjoy and not etc.
Being aware of what you like and don’t want in a life partner is a big one.

The more aware you are of these kinds of things, the more “value” you seem to have. This ties in with screening frame, qualification, and being the prize. You want to convey that you are a guy who is CHOOSING your friends, girls, and activities. You don’t take the “first and best” who accidentally stumble into you (at least don’t convey this!). To learn how to find your perfect partner, read this:

5 comments on “How to be selective in choosing partners

  1. Phoebe

    I am going to use this point to look for my next boyfriend.
    No more bad boys. I will tell my friend about what do look for too.
    Awareness is key; people.


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